Father’s Day and its Obscurity May Breed Tragedy.

To all responsible fathers out there and fathers to be; big up guys. 

On 16th June, we celebrated father’s day. I am not sure if there was any celebration because there was no fuss about it. I noted that only a few people took to social media to post their fathers pics and write some well-wisher messages alongside. The only unknown thing to me is whether those fathers are on Facebook, and secondly if they did have any chance to be told verbally those great and appreciative words posted with their pictures.

I am made to think that father’s day must have been made as a time when fathers are to be appreciated ubiquitously irrespective of circumstances for their critical role in the family as much as mother’s day is celebrated to a level it may soon become a national holiday.

Or men don’t need to be appreciated? I am wondering out loud and should it solicit your emotional displeasure, just go on and pour it on me. But in these, it may arouse feelings of remorse and regret for the way we have forgotten men and our failure to appreciate that they too sacrifice a lot for the sake of their families. In fact men need constant appreciation for their efforts. They need to know that someone appreciates all they are trying to do for their children and their mother.

It should not worry us why mean are rising against their wives and children lately. I was watching something I can’t remember but not long ago where a woman was asking her husband what name she should be calling him. The man proudly said that he preferred to be called Lion. The lion is the king of the jungle, and that is how it hopes every other animal should know. If at any point the lion realizes that there is an animal that does not appreciate that fact, it becomes violent and could want to stamp its authority. In the process, it sometimes gets out of control and the effects are dire and enormous. At times even leads to death.

Now when it comes to the natural man, they don’t expect much but can appreciate their efforts being lauded because society and the patriarchal system has had to insist on men being in charge in the family. At times things may be hard, the woman may be the one providing, but still the man needs to be made to feel that he is still the head. It is fact that when other children are trying to fight your children, they will first talk of them going to tell their daddy however feeble he may look. Now when men realize that they are trying their level best, they are in the corner fixed completely with no breathing space yet they will be putting family first, all they need is a shoulder to lean on.

This shoulder to lean on is that one of their wives and fiancées. At some point if they notice that those efforts are taken for granted and are being used as a threatening ground, they end up exploding. And now that men fight with physique and at times in ‘their empty’ part of the brain, they realize they already killed before they knew it. Men are an aggressive lot and can be harmful. So it is up to the women to let them be. The old adage goes that let sleeping lions lie. You may wake them up and end up being the sauce especially if the cats were very hungry.

The greatest challenge is to deal with the natural man in the context of expectation. If their character or rather temperament demands that they be appreciated regularly and they fail to get it, most of the times things get out of control. To them that means demeaning and being disrespectful. And this could be the reason why father’s day was incepted. It was meant to make the men feel that their role is appreciated in the family and that they are not taken for granted.

I am trying to develop the idea that Father’s day needs to be given the honor and respective celebration it needs. You know why? Men don’t need to be appreciated every now and then as do our ladies, nay, you appreciate them once in a while and they are good with that. And that opportunity can be created once in a while or be made especially special during father’s day. Father’s day comes once in a year.

So this day came a few days ago and disappeared into obscurity just like that. No big deal. I only noticed a few men trying to wish themselves a happy father’s day. I was left to wonder if that is how far this moral obligation has gone with our female folks. Well I can view it from another angle as a way to self-discovery for us as the men fraternity. This is especially in trying to understand ideally where we lie squarely in the whole of the food chain.

I finish this writing with a word to our beautiful women, that at the end of the day, it does matter whether you appreciate your man once in a while or not because the day they realize that the house girl or the average secretary in the office does appreciate their efforts, you lose him to them and wonder what went wrong.

In as much as the men are to blame for lack of the moral obligation to their women as pertains fidelity and responsiveness, it is important that our women do not end being a part of the factors that triggered the move.

Appreciate the father to you and your children. Make them understand that you are grateful for their presence in your life. Make them know that you appreciate the efforts they are putting into being there and providing for the family. Then when mother’s day comes along, come tell me he didn’t make your be the queen you are to him.


Copyright @ 2019.

Geoffrey Ndege

Geoffrey Ndege

Geoffrey Ndege is the Editor and topical contributor for the Daily Focus. He writes in the areas of Science, Politics, Policy, Technology, Current Affairs, Opinion, Agriculture, Energy, Education, Entrepreneurship, Governance, International Emerging Issues, Society, and culture. For featuring, promotions or support write to us at dailyfocus9@gmail.com
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