The Value of Time is best Known with Lost Opportunities.

It is said that time is the healer of everything. Deeply considering the statement takes us to consider a different disposition. If time is the healer of everything, the same time is the reason for everything that happens. It is tagged to virtually everything that takes place under the sun.

We regret for lost opportunities. We mourn over the words that were late spoken. We worry about the lack of time for our families. Funny enough, we are most hurt when we remember the opportunities that slipped past our fingers.

It is at this point that we wish we could go back just in time once again. With the wisdom and knowledge that we already have, we will gladly embrace it and exploit every bit of it. But then we find it impossible to reverse time and can only live with the lessons, like the case of one of my friends.

My friend had this girl he loved dearly. They had become friends by chance, but it seems fate had it all to do with them becoming together, even in marriage if possible. So, my friend would come and tell me how good this girl was to him and how much he liked her.

Unfortunately, I wasn’t so close to the girl to the extent of knowing what could have been transpiring in her mind relative to this friend of mine. All I know is that among the many people who thought these were a good pair from an observation point of view, I was one of them.

So, my friend and this girl continued being very good friends. The only gist in the story is that this guy never took the initiative of asking this girl to be his girlfriend, which ultimately would lead to a proposal and finally a marriage.

To him, it was improper for him to ask this girl to be a girlfriend, let alone a wife. Funny enough, he confessed a thousand times to me how loved her dearly and could love it if she became his wife. The fear of rejection and break of the friendship bond superseded the joy it would have brought had he asked for her hand in marriage, and the girl ended up accepting.

What he decided to do on the flip side was a bit odd. He’d hang in there until he was sure that this girl really would say yes should he decide to take things a step higher. The only problem is that he perhaps forgot to realise that he could only know by asking her, and asking her was what he wasn’t doing.

As fate, in reality, and now would have it, they finished college and each went their own way. The young man remained in Nairobi, and the girl went to a different town far from Nairobi. Luckily, with technology, they kept in touch post-college, although they couldn’t meet often as before.

Still, my guy was waiting for the opportunity when he would be sure that this girl would accept his proposal. Up to this point, time had played in his favour for a long time. And as you would guess, complacency was slowly creeping in.

The danger with being too comfortable is that we end up believing that opportunities are ours and that they will even sit and wait for us. In other words, we become too comfortable to the point that folly gets into our heads that we can easily manipulate time to our own advantage.

Now, as a good friend, I decided to push him to make a move and live to say that at least he tried. He promised he would act. Unfortunately, it was too late as I could come to learn of it later. Instead of just acting immediately, my friend went and started ‘planning’ on how to do it.

In the process of planning, one evening, the lady called him. They exchanged niceties and pleasantries as good friends could, and the lady broke the icing on the cake for that day. She had a WhatsApp group she wanted to add him to in support of something she was planning.

He gladly accepted since she was a close friend of hers. On getting added to the group, my friend was mesmerised to discover it was a wedding planning committee. He bit his lower lip hard and wondered if he should exit, but after wide consultation, he decided to stay and do what good friends do: support their fellas in their endeavours.

So, what happened until my friend ended playing victim and became a lesson to be learnt by other young men, plus a confirmation that proverbs are wise sayings? He lingered with opportunity and lost it, with or without being cognizant of that fact.

There is an African saying which says something to the effect that a man who hangs around a beautiful girl without saying a word ends up fetching water for guests at her wedding. My friends’ story reminds me of this sad reality every time I remember it.

Most importantly, it reminds me of the words he shared with me recently about this story. He philosophically told me that to him, the encounter always reminds him of the value of time. And not just any time, the value of time when an opportunity presents itself.

For those of us who have not lost dear opportunities, it might become very hard to understand what time means to us. But to the woman who had a miscarriage because she couldn’t get to the hospital in time, she deeply understands.

To the man who missed a flight by a minute, the understanding of time value becomes so clear to him as he sees the aeroplane on the runway taking off. To the person who lost a loved one because an oxygen cylinder just arrived two seconds late, nothing beats the value of time.

I could go on and on, but of course, the value of time gets best appreciated with the lost opportunities, and that will remain factual.

End.